HE IS TOO JEALOUS OVER YOU

Friday, November 8, 2013

The word "jealousy" could mean many things like the fear of being displaced by someone else in a relationship, apprehensive of losing affection or position or envying another's success. But it also means being vigilant in guarding something you love and cherish, being possessive and watchful in protecting that which you love. In many relationships, when someone gets jealous over you it shows that they actually value you, it shows that your presence in their life means a lot to them and for that reason they do not want to lose you to another. But sometimes jealousy transforms into being possessive which goes beyond just being in love with the person. The possessiveness causes the person to watch you, monitor you, and in some cases even hire someone to follow you everywhere you go so they can keep tabs on your every move. 

So I met this guy some years ago; I had known him from childhood. My parents took me to his house every Sunday but I never really paid attention to him until I was in my early 20s. He was so sweet, big, strong and amazing; he kept asking to take our friendship to the next level but I always had a dodgy answer every time. We were friends already, we chat once in a while so I wanted to keep things as "just friends" aka the friend zone. I never gave a straight forward answer, sometimes I'll lead him on and then turn around and hurt him just to see if he'll reduce his proposal but he never stopped. So one day, a friend talked me into trying to give him a chance; I reluctantly and grudgingly accepted to go on a date. Just one date and I was sprung - hook, line and sinker. I knew this was love but it was a different kind of feeling cos it was not just butterflies in my stomach, it was more like electric waves running through my veins. He held my hands, pulled me into his warm embrace and I felt just like a baby wrapped in the arms of love. Oh...please don't think this was another player trying to use sweet words on me; he was different, gentle as a dove and in his presence I felt a peace I had never felt before. I felt protected. After this date, a lot of things changed about me because he brought out the best in me, helped me excel in my academics, showed me the path of life, the true meaning of success and pointed me in the direction for a purpose driven life. He was all I ever needed and asked for. Simply amazing...

But somehow, someday...I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders and felt so burdened that I lost track of his love. No, it wasn't him-it was me. I started feeling like I didn't need him that much, felt like there was something I was missing. I just thought I needed a break for a while so I stopped calling him as often as I should have and reduced the communication. As loving as he was he never left; he still stayed and tried to persuade me to stay but I was blinded by the world and my blurred vision of his love. In the end he moved aside and just watched me walk away; but he never left. He hired a guardian angel to walk with me every step I take, to monitor every move I make and to make sure I don't fall by the way side. He watched me make some mistakes so I could learn from them, he watched me fail sometimes so I could rise again; he watched me go through some pain so I could become stronger... he just stood one place and all he did was watch and make sure no harm came to me. At some point in my life, I looked back and remembered his love... I knew it was naturally impossible for him to take me back after I had been with other guys who loved me less but I just thought I should try. I went back with tears in my eyes and he took me back. What an unconditional love...

God's love is unconditional and he is soooooo jealous over you that he just can't imagine you with someone else. He is that possessive and will do anything to fight for you even when you act like you don't need him. He will not force his love on you but will be watchful over you, guarding you through life's troubles and heartaches. He loved you so much that he gave up the most precious gift he had just to have your love. Can you not feel it? Don't let the cares of this world burden you, don't let your heart get worried/weary; just cast all your cares on him cos he cares. His jealousy makes him do crazy things for you - remember David & Goliath? It was humanly impossible for a little boy to defeat a giant but I tell people - even if it's something that God had never done before for anyone, He'll do it for me if I need it. David defeating Goliath was the first of its kind ever... it sounds cliche' but his love causes protocols to be broken for your sake, it breaks the highest Guinness World Record ever; He goes above and beyond for you. I realized this a long time ago and it can happen for you too... just let him love you jealously and fight for you, that's all he asks. Will you let him?

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BUILDING YOURSELF FOR GREATNESS

Friday, October 25, 2013

Hi lovelies, I trust you all had a great week. It's been a while I wrote a success-inspirational article and today I'm going to share with you on a topic I've been meditating on for a very long time from my pastor's message - Building Yourself for Greatness. 

Success is NOT an accident and anybody can be a success but you have to prepare for it because the future belongs to those who prepare for it. We all have dreams and goals, but it's not enough to be a dreamer because there are lots of dreamers who never achieved their dreams. It's good to dream, but don't get lost in the dream; get up and make it happen. Life has made provisions for everyone to achieve their dreams if you follow the right principles. Never blame anybody for failure cos it's just NOT an option for you. Make up your mind to be a key player not a spectator; don't live on the sidewalks...be the one to make things happen. 

Some people want it to happen

Some wish it could happen

Others make it happen

-Michael Jordan-

We all have a seed of greatness deposited inside of us from the point of conception; what you do with that seed is up to you - whether to grow it into greatness or to let it lie

dormant inside you while you blame everyone for your situation. Explore your mind and bring out the best in you; there's more to your life than you can ever imagine cos you were destined for greatness. There are few tings you need to do to prepare and build yourself for greatness; these are:

1. Cultivate a discontent with mundanity and mediocrity in your life: Refuse to be satisfied with anything that is not excellent (it doesn't make you an extremist, it just makes you someone of excellence).  Never mind critics - they are only spectators who sit on the sidewalks and watch the players; they will definitely talk about you and say things to pull you down. Please pay them no attention and no matter what you do, BE THE BEST.
2. Drive yourself to improve your mind and abilities: Seek ways to improve yourself; come out of your comfort zone and do things differently. Sometimes you have to stretch yourself beyond your limits; if you have decided to be the best then you have to work towards it and make a decision to keep doing it until you become the best. Cultivate/sharpen/harness your skills, invest in your mind-start reading the right materials - do things differently. Make sacrifices if the need be and run with the right crowd. To live a positive life, you need to surround yourself with positive people.
3. The "unseen you" is the one to make you a success - train that man/woman: The real you is the inner man where your thoughts are processed  and this is where your greatness lies so don't let that "you" be intimidated no matter what. You may have grown up in an environment where you were ridiculed, mocked and as a result you never thought you could become great. Truth is, it doesn't matter what happened in your past - if your past does not inspire you; drop it and focus on creating a beautiful future ahead. Reprogram your mind and thinking from that shy, quiet, timid young boy/girl to a bold, strong and courageous man/woman.
4.  Don't let the memory of the past stop you: If your past does not inspire you, dump it. If you feel terrible, cry or have regrets anytime you remember your past, let it go cos it's not good enough for your future. Don't be a slave to your past - focus on what lies ahead. 
5. Don't let anything stop you: Your journey to greatness will bring you to many obstacles/roadblocks but don't let them stop you. If you ever encounter a road without obstacles, it's probably cos it's leading nowhere. A road that leads to greatness will have some walls to challenge you; this will test and try you. It could come in different forms - negative words from critics, you may fail the first time, betrayal, etc. However it comes, don't let it get to you - fight the fight of faith and keep trying. If you fail seven times, rise up eight times and keep at it.

Obstacles don't have to stop you. 

If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it or work through it - Michael Jordan

I see greatness in you, wake up and run with your dreams till you achieve your desired goal. Have a great weekend

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OOPS!!! I DID IT AGAIN, BUT IT WAS A MISTAKE

Monday, August 26, 2013

OOPS!!! That moment when your thumb hits the "SEND" button and you realize you mistakenly sent a text message meant for your boyfriend to your father OR just sent an email meant for your colleague to your manager. #oh!No!!!

Yeah, I got trapped in that today. I was to send out a text message for a surprise party to someone and mistakenly sent it to a group that had the celebrant. The funny thing is I initially wanted to create a new group excluding the celebrant but thought to myself, "I won't make that mistake" and yeah right...I didn't *covers face* When I realized what had happened, you needed to see how I almost ripped off the button that should cancel the sending but it was too late. Once that "SEND" button was pressed, there was no going back, no matter what I did. Few seconds later, I felt really funny cos the party is supposed to be a surprise and now I've ruined it. It took a while before I let it go but I just had to cos the damage had already been done; I just prayed the message never delivers to him or his eyes just won't see it, loll. After beating up myself for screwing up, I sat back to reflect on how it happened. The truth is, I was a bit pissed at something before sending the message and if I was more cautious I would have noticed the message recipient had more than one contacts in it. I should have also made sure that I was sending to the right person but I didn't check. But as soon as the damage was done, my eyes opened. 

Many times we find ourselves in this position in life usually in our words or actions towards others. We say or do things that we did not mean to do which indirectly hurts others; once a word proceeds from your lips, you can't take it back. These may be in response to what someone told you (which may not even be true), what you saw or read or maybe your imaginations. In that moment of anger, we fall into the "OOPS!" moment and never realize what damage has been done until it actually happens. This has cost us friendship, relationships, marriages, promotion at work, etc. There will always be that soft voice nudging you to calm down/take a second look before you do what's in your mind. Let's say you apologize like I tried to cancel the message from sending... but something has happened and inside you, you'll feel really bad cos if you thought about the words you said before it left your mouth-maybe you wouldn't have said it. You've left a crack somewhere on the wall without knowing. 

But thank God, unlike my cancel button, relationships and all the "...ships" can be mended but we should pay more attention to details. Be more careful; before you unleash/react, ask yourself what will be the effect of my action/word. If you make that mistake, what will be the result? Instead of beating yourself up later, think first before acting cos it will minimize the "had I known(s)" and "if only(s)". 

So what OOPS moment have you experienced lately? Pls share in the comment box below

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YOU NEED MY HELP .... WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME???

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

The call lasted for about 30 minutes but at the end of the conversation, he asked "so what's in it for you?" I acted like I didn't understand and asked him to please explain. He said, you've been so nice to me from the first day, you're offering to help me get stronger and you've spoken encouraging words, I just want to know what you'll benefit from it. I laughed... I just remembered our first encounter.

..........................................................

From afar, I had sighted him walking down, pressing some buttons on his phone and also looking really tired but I was determined to speak to him. It took few minutes before he got closer, I smiled at him and started a conversation. It seemed like he was in a hurry to get to his destination but he did not mind the interruption. I didn't conclude my message to Cassy cos I knew he needed to get home, so we exchanged contacts. That night, I sent an inspirational message to him and called the next day. Somehow, he opened up to me about what was bothering him - his 10 years relationship just ended and he has two daughters with his ex; he was going through emotional challenges and it was really weighing him down. I encouraged him to be strong and cast it all on God. Now back to the question..what was in it for me? I tried to understand why he would ask that question, and suddenly it hit me that it was I who initiated the conversation, the one calling and the one always checking up on him. He obviously thought I was being nice for a reason. My answer to his question was "my joy is to know that somehow, I am helping someone get back on their feet again; I am encouraging someone not to give up no matter how bad the situation may be and that's what's in it for me". I did not blame Brian for asking the question, it's the norm in our societies today to want something in return for any good deed. A typical example common in Nigeria is helping a driver who's car just broke down on the highway...you'll hear some guys saying "Oga, anything for the boys?" His car just broke down on the highway, you don't know if he even has any money on him at the moment. We have so embraced the society that we find ourselves in and we take everything the way we see it, something has to give - but that shouldn't be so. Ask yourself how many times you've actually done something nice for someone without expecting anything back. 

It is difficult sometimes to invest your energy, time and resources in someone and not

expect something in return. In Uni, there were two guys I actually took as projects. I told God that I want to be the answer to the cry of the needy and I want to spend my life mending broken people so I was ready for the task ahead. They had both been written off by family members and tagged as "black sheep of the family" but I saw a light in them that they couldn't even see in themselves. It cost me a lot, one of them had sickle cell anemia and smoked marijuana...he had no regard for his life. Anytime he was in the hospital, I would spend money visiting and buying stuff. His mum had gotten tired of crying and begging him to change so she stopped sending him money. He actually stole my phone sometime and sold it...but I forgave him and never gave up on him. It took months, but I kept at it, slowly but gradually his life started changing for the better. His mother actually wanted to meet me...she thought I was his girlfriend. Some of my friends thought I was crazy (loll) but I had a mission and 4 years after we graduated from uni, he called to thank me for helping him get through those days. His dissertation had my name in the acknowledgement page. The joy you get from such experience alone, is enough to keep being good to people even when there's nothing in it for you. The second guy finally became a youth coordinator in his church many years later. 

Never do good to people cos you're expecting something in return; do it because you want to help, do it to add a smile to someone's face, do it for the love of God. You may be the only one who can help that person move from point A - B, don't ignore him/her cos you're expecting something. Your reward may not come in a measure that can be weighed in monetary values but your good deeds will make ways for you where there may be no way.

Keep up the good work, live a life of purpose, think of ways to help and do it with a cheerful heart and expect nothing in return. 

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Waiting for Mr Right...Are you Mrs Right

Sunday, July 21, 2013

Hi guys, it's been a while I wrote an article on my blog. Apologies, but I still had you guys in mind and instead of writing this time I decided to make a video. It's the ladies' version of an article on my blog titled "In search of Mrs Right, Are you Mr Right". Follow this link to read the article http://lynnville.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/are-you-that-kinda-guy.html 

I'll love to read your comments and your views about it. 

XX

Lynn

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DRESS TO KILL…BUT DON’T KILL YOUR BANK ACCOUNT

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Walking to my desk one morning, with my bagel and caramel cappuccino Starbucks coffee to spark up the day; next thing I heard from one of my team members was “Lynda, I’m sure you spend all your salary on clothes”…HAHAHAHAHA; I laughed so hard my coffee spilled. I turned again to look at her and in fact laughed even more. HELL NO…Who does that? I hardly even shop (for real).

As much as we want to look good, fashion and style is something you must possess on the inside before it can reflect outside. It is that thing in you that can transform any piece of clothing into a beautiful outfit, it is that charisma and poise that goes with you when you dress up; it’s about your inner self. Style is not seen in the number of clothes hanging in your wardrobe or how many designers clothes you have. Style is a definition of your inner self and how it is reflected on the outside. No matter how many clothes you have, you can still go wrong with body fitting, colour combination, wrong matching or poor accessories. Fashion is one of the easiest things to do; but yet kinda complicated. You have to understand its language in order to communicate effectively.

Having said that, so many people have the mindset of “dressing to kill” and this drives them to do crazy things just to fit into a particular class. So how do you dress to kill without killing your bank account???

Define Who You Are: This is the first thing you have to do. Ask yourself who you are, what you represent and how you want to be addressed. Who you are will be seen on how you dress, what image will you be portraying if you dress different from who you are? Let your dressing reflect your image.

Know Where To Shop: The bible said “My people perish for lack of knowledge”. Absolutely true because some people’s fashion sense has perished for lack of knowledge of where to shop. They have the money, but just don’t know the right shop for what they want. So they use the money on the wrong clothes and end up with fashion police, loll. As a young lady, you don’t go to a mama’s shop to buy clothes cos you will buy something that will make you look older than your age.

Shop According To The Size of Your Wallet: Yeah…this is where a lot of people get it WRONG. Watch confessions of a shopaholic. Why heap up debts for yourself all because you want to shop more than you can afford? You can admire Vicky Becks (Victoria Beckham) but sweetie, your pockets aint the same size so don’t get yourself in trouble. Refer to No 2… there are shops where you can get beautiful outfits that will not cost you a fortune. It’s no use buying a top for £575; then a skirt to go with it for £320 when your monthly salary is £1000. Who are you trying to impress? No one is going to stop you on the way and ask how much your outfit cost or how much your total look is worth. You don’t have to compare yourself with anyone; dress to impress yourself and be content with what you have. Best advice, shop when things are on sale and you still get quality for a good price not armed-robber salary price. With £50, I can buy 4 good looking clothes and still dazzle on the red carpet. Fashion is how you put the little pieces together to create a unique style, you don’t have to spend a fortune to look good.

Prioritize - Buy What You Need NOT What You Want: Sitting opposite me in the office is a wonderful colleague (a guy) who is a shopaholic. He goes out for lunch and comes back with new shoes, more than twice lolll. He has more shoes than a lady. One Thursday morning, he send me a text saying he’s shopping on Oxford Street (really??? Instead of coming to work) and then he strolls in late to work with this ah-may-zing blazers. In his words… “I just couldn’t let it go, it was originally £110 but on sale now £30”. He has so many blazers but just wanted to add that to his collection. This morning, I mentioned to another colleague that I haven’t bought anything for myself since December 2012 cos I’m trying to be discipline with shopping/spending so I can save money and she goes “What??? I can’t do that”. She said she does not earn as much as she wants to spend so she spends what she gets… sooo funny. This is what happens to so many people. If you don’t need it, save the money instead of putting yourself in unnecessay debt.

Put A Check On Yourself: You may be able to skip through step 3 above and decide to shop according to your wallet size but if you have friends who love shopping around you…then you need to keep a check on yourself. If you can’t win them, PLS don’t join them. Instead WEAN them. I fell into a trap sometime in 2010; went shopping with two friends and I ended up with 2 items for £110 and the worst part was that I did not even like these outfits myself but my friends thought it was “to-die-for”. Fortunately for me, there’s a refund and exchange policy in England (if say na naija I go just cry cos I was still a student then). I got back home feeling so unhappy…the next day I took them back cos I didn’t even need them in the first place. So how do you put a check on yourself? When they come knocking, give an excuse to go somewhere; leave your credit/debit card at home if you could not find a good excuse. Go with them, but when it’s time to pay just start searching your purse and say “ouch… I forgot my credit card” with a sad look L on your face. Tell them you’ll come pick it up the next day (lol). There’s always a way to put a check; you just need to know your friends and how to work with them. 

Recycling: Some people think it’s a crime to repeat a dress you’ve worn before; NO there’s absolutely nothing with wrong with that. What will be wrong is repeating it after 3 times in a week. I’ll tell you what I do; I have some clothes I’ve only worn once in 6 months. So I do not wear these clothes for a long time but when I wear them again, people admire it as though it is new. Whenever I am tempted to buy something new, I stand in front of my wardrobe and say to myself…”Lynda, there must be something here that you can wear and eventually I find something to wear after many trials in front of the mirror trying to pair outfits”. There’s always a way out.

Try Something Different: If you have a dress that you’ve always worn in one pattern; probably cos that’s how it was set on the mannequin when you bought it… It’s time to try something different. For example, I wore one of my dresses to work today but I usually wear it with a waist belt or a blazer but today I decided to do something different. I put a waist coat on it…I loved the outcome J. If you have a long sleeved shirt, try folding the sleeves to create a funky ¾ turn-up sleeve. If you’ve always used a white shirt for that blazers, try to add something colorful to the outlook. Spice up your look, let there be something new about your dressing every day, step out of the comfort zone.

There are more tips to give you, like knowing what kinda clothes best suit your body shape; what accessories to match your outfit; colour combination, how to pair your clothes, and finally your composure/poise/charisma. After all is said and done and you cannot compose yourself, your fashion sense would be incomplete.

I hope this was helpful, now you can dress to kill without killing your bank account. 

XX...Lynn

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INCOMPLETE WITHOUT HIM...

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Beautifully and Wonderfully made for HIS glory

You are my bright and morning star

The air I breathe that's who you are

Your touch ignites me

Your smile excites me

You are in everything I do

I'm incomplete without you

I don't know what I'll  do

If I would...If I would loose you

Words alone are cannot explain the ignition and feelings that surge through my body while in His presence. His touch is so magical; his smile so exciting I want to keep looking at his face. Oh, and his words are as sweet as a honey comb. His big arms wrap me up in his warm embrace..I just wanna be there forever. What an ecstasy and sweet fellowship, I love him so much. But then, I wonder why he loves me the way He does; why He chose me from the crowd; why He fashioned me the way He did. In my imperfection, He saw a perfect heart; in my inability He is more than able; in the time of weakness He is always my strength, my ever present help, my all in all. What would I ever do without You... I love you Jesus, I'm so incomplete without you. 

I just had to express how much I love God. For the past 7 days, I have been off social media - Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Blogging etc. I just wanted to get lost in Him and fine-tune my antenna to His frequency, to go deeper in my relationship with Him. And...WOW, it was and has been so exciting. Sometimes you need to take time off the things that take your attention and focus on God for clarity, focus, wisdom and directions. A place of solitude, worship, fasting and prayers. A place of LOVE. 

Every moment of prayer is an investment in eternity and true romance of righteousness... Pastor Chris Oyakhilome

Indeed, the place of prayer and worship is a sweet, loving, romantic experience. No one can ever love you  the way God does, there is no love greater than His. I just can't explain the feeling. So when you feel the world is crumbling on your shoulders and there's nowhere to hide, He's always there by your side; he wants to hold you tight and take your tears away. Through every challenge, trouble, worry, cares, whatever the need...just get into a sweet romance with God and experience spiritual ecstasy that turns situations around. Just focus your gaze on the "SON" and you won't see the shadows. I'm already seeing the results...I'll share them with you gradually as  the days go by.

I encourage you to listen to this song... I was moved to tears in worship, the chorus is written above. I couldn't find the video on YouTube so watch the full song here http://www.pastorchrisonline.org/channel/watch/cha3e8p/?videoID=vid59ab#

Have a beautiful week

Lynn

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TIME WAITS FOR NO ONE

Monday, March 11, 2013

HEY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE...It's been a while, apologies for going AWOL for 2 weeks without a word. I've been pretty busy, so so so busy you can't imagine. Thank God for my life, I finally got to change my hair (after errmmm...3 months *covers face* #trueconfession) since December, unlike me but trust me to keep it looking fab at all times. People were still asking where I made the hair as though I made it just last week. 

OK...back to business.

We've all been given 24 hours in a day to spend, for how long we will continue to spend these daily hours...we do not know. Whether for 70 or 80 years we do not know. What we do with our 24 hours in every 365 days determines how the 70/80 years would eventually turn out. The difference from where you are today and where you want to be in the next 5 years is TIME. Are you using yours wisely or are you wasting it? Are you investing your time? How valuable is time to you? What are the things you spend more time on? Are those things taking you closer to where you want to be in the future or are they delaying you or maybe putting you on a spot? Time flies my dearest; clocks don't stop ticking and time won't wait. I remember when we were so excited about the new millennium; now it's 13 years later and still counting. If you decide to do nothing with the time you have, it would not stop time from moving. Your age will continue to increase as the years run by; winter and summer will still come and go; everything that was supposed to happen will still happen except that YOU will still remain at one spot. Do something with your time, add something to your life, while time flies...fly with it; invest in yourself  and make the best of your 24 hours in each 365 days. My friend Niyi (Neeyee) Oladeji posted this short analogue below on his facebook page and it's just in-sync with TIME so I decided to share it with you.

Consider a 30yr old lady without a University degree. Let’s assume she thought of being a PhD holder but felt that it was too late considering her age. Imagine if she decided to enroll for a University degree which would take an average of 3 years in UK and immediately afterwards she enrolled for an MSc programme which would take a year. Most likely, by the time she is 35yrs old, she would have been an MSc holder. 

If she chooses to go further immediately, she then enrols for a PhD which should take around 4 years. She would be a PhD holder by the time she is 40yrs. I know I have eliminated all other circumstances surrounding her decisions, such as, family, finances and other commitments but the fact is either she decides to develop herself or not she would have reached 40yrs anyway.

Moral: Time waits for no one. It continues at the same pace no matter what you choose to do with yours. Invest your time wisely to develop yourself intellectually because sooner than later your investments would differentiate you from other people. An investment does not have to do with Masters or PhD, it could be in certifications, learning a new language, expanding your spiritual capacity or learning a new skill. 

Have a lovely week ahead

XX

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY REV. ANITA OYAKHILOME

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

When we hear stories about angels and marvel at the glory of God’s creation; I can testify that I have seen one. An angel in a human body, a shining star full of splendour and glory. A woman of valour, a virtuous woman, a mother, a sister and friend… On the 26^th of February many years ago, God was so kind to bless the world with one of his angels in the person of PASTOR ANITA OYAKHILOME. 

I love her so much.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MA.

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LECTURE 101: MIND MANAGEMENT

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Hey beautiful people…

How often do you find yourself humming to the tune of a song you just heard someone singing? It may have been your first time of hearing the song but out of the blues you just start humming to the tune of the song. Yes or No? Well, if you lie… godiswatching u oh. I’m am very honest so, “yels” I find myself singing in the shower, sometimes to the soundtrack of a movie (doesn’t mean I’ll audition for X-Factor or Idol J). I wake up at intervals most nights and some of those times I say a prayer before going back to bed. There was this particular night where instead of starting my prayers, the first thing that came to my mind was “crying in the rain”. It was the sound track for “Mr & Mrs”; one of the best Naija movies I watched last year. Immediately, I took my phone and set it to my worship playlist. I placed it on the dock and increased the volume cos I wanted the music to drown the soundtrack replaying in my mind so that I can focus on my prayers. This is how we should guard our heart/mind to determine what stays and what should go. Proverbs 4:23 - Keep your heart with all diligence for out of it spring the issues of life.

Now the proper lecture…

We are products of the things we watch, hear, read, the people we interact with and the places we go. These things form images in your mind, and then you begin to think about them, you spend time pondering on them; next thing they form habits and then eventually your character. Basically, they contribute to your perception about life, they determine how you think, speak and act.

Luke 6:45says “For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.”

Ecclesiastes 11:13 says “If the clouds be full of rain, they empty themselves upon the earth”.

What will flow out of the abundance of your heart? When you are full, what will you pour out to the people around you? In the course of life, we acquire knowledge from the things we watch, hear, read, the people we interact with and the places we go. Now the question is:

• What kind of things do you watch?
• What kind of things do you read?
• What kind of things/people do you listen to?
• What kind of people do you interact with?
• What kind of places do you go to?

When you have answered these questions then you will know the kinda words and actions that will flow out from you. The quality of our life is shown in the quality of the character we display and the words we speak. It is time to drown those words and negative information that comes into your heart subconsciously, it is time to say NO to those friends who do not add value to your life, it is time to stay away from those places that do not add value to you, places that do not uplift your spirit; it is time to discard those magazines and books that do not inspire you to be the person God has created you to be…you know the ones I’m talking of right? Run with the right crowd, read/watch stuff that are educative, inspirational and motivational because if you do not manage your mind, the things you allow to go in there will manage you instead. Your heart is like a garden, you plant the seeds you want to grow; you water the field and nurture it making sure that you take off the weeds so that they do not spoil the good seed. Don’t find yourself doing the wrong things and putting the blame on the devil; you decide the things you let into your mind and they will affect your actions. Manage your mind or the devil will manage it for you…if you let him. He knows how to persuade people with the sweetest pleasures of all times; with proper management and adherence to your manager’s(God’s) words, your eyes will be blinded to such deception.

What plans have you made? What New Year resolutions have you made? I know you’re working towards them…PERFECT, but be vigilant. Guard your heart with all diligence. Turn up the volume of everything POSITIVE around you and be sure to drown the voice of every negative thought or influence.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Philippians 4:8 

Have a beautiful weekend. I’ll like you to share your thoughts on the article.

XX

Lynn

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THE GRASS IS ALWAYS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Hi sweet-cakes....yes, you reading this. Welcome to a new week. Its been a while I posted an article on LynnVille; I've been pretty busy. Lots of ups and downs and all sorts of things coming up but I knew this day wouldn't pass by without me sending a shout to my beloved readers who have made this journey worth-while. So we're talking about green grasses today huh? I'll just go straight to the point.

So on this fateful Monday morning, I walked up to the coffee machine in the office to get my regular dose of hot chocolate to get me fired up for work. On getting there, I met an Indian colleague...let's call her Priya. And then we got talking, girls and lil' gossips and chats about the weekend. As the conversation was getting to an end, Priya said, "I love your new hair" and I said thanks. And the she's like, "you're so lucky you can decide to change your hair style whenever you want, unlike me I just have one thing to do to my hair; its either I pack it up or just let it down and that's all". While she was talking, I was like..O.M.G what's wrong with this chic??? As in, I was lost in the conversation. See me see wahala oh...does this girl know how much I want to have her hair? I quickly remembered how much my Indian human hair cost me...I was speechless. I just looked at her and smiled and said thanks for the compliments. In that split second, I just realised that it was not her fault co the grass is always greener on the other side. I'm sure she genuinely wants to have different hair styles and different looks but could not freestyle like me. On the other hand, many Africans will do anything to have their hair long, curly & silky like the Indians. Sometimes I say stuff like, if only God will ask me what I want to change on my body I'll say He should change my African hair to smooth, silky and wavy hair. How ungrateful I was? Ah...Baba I'm sorry.

So how many times have you wished you were like that your neighbour who had a big mansion and flashy cars? Do you know if he sleeps peacefully at night? It's always easy to want what somebody else has without even knowing what that person goes through because of that particular thing you've been eyeing. We need to appreciate the things that God has blessed us with, our family, friends, job, yourself as a person. Cos that thing about you or that thing you have which you take for granted, someone else is also wishing they had it. If there's anything you so desire, talk to God (not things like changing your black skin to white oh...) and in time God will provide it for you. Love yourself for who you are and don't change yourself for anything, there's a reason God made you the way you are. There's no other person as unique, pretty, handsome, awesome, intelligent and special as you. Keep that in mind this week.

Cheers sweeties....

XX

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STEP OUT, DON'T GET TOO COMFORTABLE

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

It was that time of the night, cozy and chilly, snuggling up in my bed. I had taken the perfect position, curled up just like a baby under the warm duvet and ready to drift off to the fantasy world. Oops...I forgot to turn off the light; aarrgghh. I just wished I had a bedside switch or the string you pull to turn the light on and off. I couldn't even imagine getting up from that comfortable position. No way..."I said to myself". I closed my eyes and shut them very tight hoping that soon I will be fast asleep and not even notice that the light was on. It didn't help cos I continued tossing and turning; waking up at intervals until I grudgingly stood up from the bed and turned the light off. After that, I didn't even realise how I slept off till the next morning. 

There's something about getting too comfortable with a particular position or place. You enjoy it so much that you don't want to leave; you're so engrossed and buried so deep that you don't feel there is a need to go elsewhere. This position is your comfort zone, a place or situation where you feel at ease and without stress. In this position, you don't want to stress yourself (just as I didn't want to get up from the bed), you just want to remain in that place where you don't have to handle more responsibilities. Do you know what your comfort zone does to you? It kills your zeal to aim high, it makes you reluctant to do anything other than what you are already used to, it takes away your motivating factor and driving force. Some people find themselves in this position because they are scared of what will happen on the other side; but you will never know what will happen till you step out of that comfort zone. 

There are some people who have vowed in their heart that they have reached their final destination and will not go more than where they are today. God wishes above all things that you prosper....and His prosperity is not a stagnant one; its an upward and forward life. So why do you want to put a limit to how far you want to go? He doesn't want you to stay in one position for a long time.

Deuteronomy 2:3 - ye have encompassed this mountain long enough; turn ye northwards

Have you not stayed there long enough? Are you not tired of being in that position? Have you gotten too comfortable and relaxed that you've forgotten you're a moving train? It's time to move forward. Challenge yourself, think outside the box, do something you've never done before.   I'm also speaking to myself cos I'm supposed to take a professional course but I've been  moving the start date. If you have a desire to get to a particular place in life, keep pursuing it irrespective of what today may look like. Just keep pushing your way through, don't be discouraged by the fear of uncertainty or failure. Just keep moving forward cos greater things await you outside your comfort zone. All you have to do is STEP OUT and embrace greatness. 

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I WAS HERE: WORLD HUMANITARIAN DAY

Sunday, August 19, 2012

ONE DAY, ONE MESSAGE, ONE GOAL

TO INSPIRE PEOPLE ALL OVER THE WORLD

TO DO SOMETHING GOOD 

NO MATTER HOW BIG OR SMALL

FOR SOMEONE ELSE

Today is the World Humanitarian Day, a time to recognize those who face danger and adversity in order to help others. The day was designated by the General Assembly to coincide with the anniversary of the 2003 bombing of the United Nations headquarters in Baghdad, Iraq, which killed 22 UN staff. Every day humanitarian aid workers help millions of people around the world, regardless of who they are and where they are. World Humanitarian Day is a global celebration of people helping people.

We are not just in this world to eat, drink, acquire degrees, get married, have kids, grow old, die and be buried. NO…there’s more to life than meets the eye. We need to make an impact, change a life, touch someone’s life positively and leave a mark in the sands of time. There are people who have been aligned in your path for you to reach. They may have dirty clothing with dirty hands and feet; they may not have the lovely scent from your cologne/perfume or speak posh/British English like you do. But they have been placed in your path so their lives could be better.  Don’t refuse to do that one thing that will put a smile on someone’s face. Let their lives be better because YOU WERE HERE. This reminds me of my first article on this blog, I’LL BE THERE….It will inspire you.

You may not be a fire-fighter, in the army, emergency rescue team or the ambulance services; but there is something you can do for someone out there so that tomorrow when the story is being told, you’ll raise your hand and say I WAS HERE.

Listen to the song I WAS HERE by Beyonce...i was moved to tears.

Have a lovely week ahead.

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GUEST POST: LIFE IS NOT A COMPETITION

Friday, August 17, 2012

I was jogging one day and I noticed a person in front of me, about 1/4 of mile. I could tell he was running a little slower than me and I thought, good, I shall try to catch him. I had about a mile to go my path before I needed to turn off. so I started running faster and faster. Every block, I was gaining on him just a little bit. After just a few minutes I was only about 100 yards behind him, so I really picked up the pace and push myself. You would have thought I was running in the last leg of London Olympic competition. I was determined to catch him.

Finally, I did it! I caught and passed him by. On the inside I felt so good. "I beat him" of course, he didn't even know we were racing. After I passed him, I realized I had been so focused on competing against him that I had missed my turn. I had gone nearly six blocks past it. I had to turn around and go all back.

Isn't that what happens in life when we focus on competing with co-workers, neighbours, friends, trying to outdo them or trying to prove that we are more successful or more important?

We spend our time and energy running after them and we miss out on our own paths to our God given destinies. The problem with unhealthy competition is that it’s a never ending cycle. There will always be somebody ahead of you, someone with better job, nicer car, more money in the bank. I can be the best that I can be, I am not competing with no one. Some people are insecure because they pay too much attention to what others are doing, where they are going, what they are wearing and driving. Take what God has given you, the height, the weight, the personality, dress well and wear it proudly. May God in His awesomeness bless you all with Wisdom to see His plans for you.

Guest post by:Barr. Franca John

MY VIEWS (Lynn)

We should understand that there are different phases in life. When a child is born, the child first crawls, then tries to stand. In that stage, he/she will need support by holding onto things; finally the child gets to walk alone and finally starts to run. Such is life.  

There is a stage where you are still growing and God will give you what you need/require to be the best in that stage. When you move to the next level, He also equips you for that stage while gradually leading you to your purpose through the path that He has destined for you.

When you see someone else who is in his/her walking stage while you are still crawling (I don't mean crawl literally) you find yourself trying to compete with that person; thus veering off the path God has placed you in. While you're busy focusing your attention on trying to walk, you may break a leg because your bones aren't strong enough to support such stress on it. So instead of competing with others, choose to out-do your past, compete with your greatest achievements and desire to do more. That person's path of life may be different from yours; you may not even be well equipped to face the challenges on that route. You'll end up stressing yourself and find out that you have missed your turn. Trust God and His plans, take one step at a time; focus on where He is taking you to and walk with Him all the way.

Have a lovely weekend.

Lynn

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ONE MOMENT OF PLEASURE...IS IT REALLY WORTH IT?

Saturday, July 21, 2012

THE GUY

Tony: I thought about it for a second; No, I can’t.

           I put my face down for a while just to erase the thought.

          Yeah, I can control my mind and that’s exactly what I’ll do.

Eki:  Hi, I think I recognise you from somewhere; you were at the Thai restaurant in     
         Covent Garden for Sylvia’s birthday dinner.

Tony: Oh no!!! Not her………………………………..

           I wanted to act like I did not remember her

           It was too late  cos she remembered my name.

          There was no hiding from this, but not again today (a     
          still small voice whispered in my head). 


Eki was a beauty queen, the first sight of her was angelic, she was a goddess. I couldn’t help but lust after her; I knew it was lust cos I loved my fiancé and would never cheat on her. But Eki was irresistible and just wouldn’t stop, the way she danced and laughed was what drew me to her. I was supposed to be at the wedding party with my fiancé but she had to leave cos she had a professional exam the next day. In her words, “baby…ACCA is very important; it will give me a greater advantage to get big accounting jobs”.  I knew it was important so I had to let her go but she asked me to stay back and have fun with my friends. If only she stayed. I finally looked up at Eki and said hi (acting like I was trying to remember who she was); before I could complete the statement she flung herself into my arms and said “wow, Tony it’s you”, I didn’t know I’ll ever see you again. I knew the face was familiar but I needed to be sure it was you; that’s why I came closer.

Now my heart was pounding, I was being hunted by that wedding night and the things we (Eki and I) did. I could blame it all I want on alcohol but the fact still remains that I could have walked away when I had the chance to but I didn’t. Something told me to walk away but I couldn’t; the heart was strong but the flesh was willing and so………..I fell for her charms and now all I want to do is untie myself from her web. (My heart pounded faster). Tony is everything okay? Ye-yeahh, I stuttered. I took another look at her; I wanted to tell her that I was engaged and that she should forget what happened on the wedding night cos I was drunk. I had memorised the way I’ll say it to her; before I could utter a word she caught me off guard and planted a holy kiss on my lips. Immediately…..i was sprung once again and I heard her whisper…..what she doesn’t know will not hurt her. I looked at her again,….I know you have a fiancé but don’t worry this is our little secret. No one has to know. The thought of keeping things from Bukky pierced my soul, I allowed myself get drowned in this mess; if she finds out my life is over. What do I do, i love my fiance but can't stop??? 

THE LADY

‘Honey, snap back to reality’, Kris said as he shook me from behind and gave me a peck on the cheek. I quivered a lil bit cos I didn’t realise he was there while I was staring into thin air with my thoughts wandering miles away. He came over to stand in front of me, ‘I know you Jenny…there’s something on your mind, I want to hear it and please don’t say it’s nothing’. As usual, my response was ‘I’m fine sweetie, trust me on this one’. You know how I like to just look into the skies and watch the birds chirp and flap their wings (I hoped he wouldn’t press further). Kris smiled and looked right into my eyes, as though he was going to cast a spell on me to make me talk; I could sense he wasn’t giving up on this one till I said what the problem was. We’ve been friends from childhood and spent our teenage years together before we both left the country for our B.Sc & M.Sc. He could read my mind, he was my second conscience. Hhmmm but this one…I couldn’t tell him. 


Kris and I bonded again when he moved from New York to London. He got a job here and decided to take it in order to be closer to his family. Our puppy love as kids gradually blossomed into a perfect relationship, the way I had always imagined it to be. He was everything I asked for, my knight in shining armour. One weekend Kris had to travel back to New York for his brother’s graduation, he was going to spend only 5 days and come back to London. I couldn’t wait for him to return….I even slept in his pajamas all night.

At 7pm, just 2days after he left, Kris called me and told me he had to help a friend who just came into town and was stranded as he lost his wallet in a transit flight so he could not pay for a hotel. Ok love, I love you…..and the call ended. Obi knocked at the door few minutes past 9pm. O.M.G!!! It was as though Denzel Washington just walked into my apartment. You must be Jenny, he said. My mouth was still open as I was in awe of the perfectly and artistically crafted image standing right in front of me. Oops…(my mind jogged back to my senses), yeah I am and you must be Obi. Welcome. I had to take him to the guest room and get him something to eat. I took extra time to make sure everything was perfect for him (why??? My heart was skipping miles). I was giving him the same treatment I will give Kris and this was not a good sign. Fast forward….I made it through that night with my dignity still intact. The second night, Oh God!!! His chest, those arms, the smile…what is wrong with me? I’m lusting after my fiancee's friend. Obi finished his meal and brought the plates to the kitchen, as he was leaving, we bumped into each other and that was how we started talking. The chat got deeper and deeper; our faces drew closer and closer and....the rest is history. My eyes opened after the deed was done, Obi saw the guilt in my eyes. He held my face up and said “Jenny, I saw the way you looked at me from the first day you opened that door, somehow I felt it too but you’re my friend’s fiancée. Just one thing…He doesn’t have to know". 

Hhhmmmm........he/she doesn't have to know??? No matter how dark the night gets, the sun will still shine in the morning. One day, something will happen that will let the cat out of the bag. Hence my question........


Is it really worth it? To give up 80% for a pleasurable 20%.

Is it worth it? To give up a need for a want?

Is it worth giving up happiness with the woman/man who loves you for a one-stop-shop that will only last for moments?

Read the Lyrics of this song....makes real sense cos in the end it's all about the decisions we make. TO ACT ON THAT THOUGHT or NOT TO. 

It all starts from that one thought. What is your opinion?

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